So many women struggle with the choice of whether to go back to work or stay at home full time. They are both JOBS. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to go back. I’ve talked about it a little before, but it honestly took me until Liv was around 9 months before I felt “normal”. There are so many aspects of healing after a baby. Emotionally, hormonally, physically. It just takes time. So after some time, careful thought, and things falling into place, I felt it was time to go back. I am fortunate enough to work mostly from home and pop in and out during the day to see her so it made my decision a little easier 😉
Now that I am back in the swing of things I feel more alive and want to do even more than before. That little girl is my motivation!
So this week I took a HUGE step (several meltdowns before) and have been in New York for work. This has been the longest I have been away from her! The trip so far has been a whirlwind and I haven’t had much time to keep in touch with everyone helping with her. I honestly haven’t worried about her for a second. I thought for a moment last night, “Does that mean I am a terrible Mom?”….
No, I’m not, but I still battle with the guilt. I still have my moments at dinner with my colleagues when I think about her and wonder if I made the right choice. But I know I made the right choice for ME and my family. I admire the women that stay home full time, I admire the women that go back to work full time because they are doing what makes sense for them.
So, when you start feeling that mom guilt or even the guilt of, “I’m not ready for kids,” remember you are doing your best. You still have a life, you still have goals. Those goals can be different than your friends. So just do you.
P.S.- I can not wait to bring our little family back to NYC in the next few months! Liv will love all the action on the streets, the lovely people, and the energy of this city.